It comes every year, the US mail equivalent of that annoying, recorded warning on all your favorite carnival rides: “THIS RIDE IS ABOUT TO STOP.” Only it is a letter that comes from the superintendent of schools—two full weeks before the end of vacation! Every year it’s basically the same. Every year it assaults me. Hope you’re enjoying vacation blah blah blah BUT get ready to come back!
Okay. I’m acutely aware that my vacation is dwindling as quickly as my bank balance, but my desire to go back to work is not nearly as strong as my desire for another paycheck. In fact, it never will be. Ever. And reminding me that I’ll spend my first day back at work in the auditorium at convocation, listening to motivational speeches geared for grammar school teachers, just puts me in a worse mood.