I need some help living in the moment. Living in the moment for me, right now, means acknowledging that I am tired and I ache from head to toe. Sleep is no longer restorative. Sleeping in on weekends helps--only until Monday comes. Living in the moment means being hot and cranky and stressed out. And miserable. In a bad mood.
It is difficult to feel blessed and all that happy spiritual stuff--which I really do believe in--when I'm a hot mess with frizzy hair and stiff joints, who can't speak a sentence without at least one expletive. All I want is for this school year to end so I can get back to a better me.
My pool opened a few weeks ago but I haven't been there yet. I'd rather hide in the air conditioning than be around other people's ill-behaved children. I have higher expectations for my pool this year. I am waiting to take my first dip when no one is around, to let the water wash away all that was wrong with my school year. To refresh me.
I want to feel better. Happier. Healthier. Freer. More creative. I want to spend every day living in and enjoying the moment, not looking forward to the time when I can again.