Day 6 of vacation and I'm finally relaxed. I think. Seems like a luxury to have the time to settle in and learn again the art of relaxation, right? To the non-teacher, yes. To my teacher friends, no. Necessary. Sad but true.
I spent most of the first day feeling relief--and a little anger. "Yay, it's over!," could quickly morph into "glad I don't have to go to that f**king place for a while. It almost killed me!" Of course it didn't really, but it did crush my soul a little. Text messaging with friends on Day 1 wherein we reveled in the absolutely absurd ways we could now waste time kept the anger from working its way in from the edges. I am grateful for that.
Day 2 was better. It wasn't a dream, a too-hot-for-school day; I really was on vacation. And I didn't want to be angry anymore. So when I needed to come in from the sun (having overdosed on sun and fresh air on Day 1), I started making lists: things I need to get done this summer/this week/today, things I'd like to do, things I'd love to do. As I made the lists--some mental, some in my iPad-- that day, and the next, and the next, I was mindful not to put too much pressure on myself. It is vacation after all.
And so it went for the next couple of days, as I moved from anger and relief to possibilities and hope. (And understanding that staying drunk for the duration is probably not in anyone's best interest... I didn't say never! Just not the whole time.) Anyway. Finally, I think I've moved on to relaxed. Truly relaxed.
My accomplishments today? I remembered again to wear Chapstick with SPF and I finished reading a book I started 6 months ago. Tonight I'm off to a painting class with some friends who know the stages of vacation as well.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm there.